Six Poems
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by Jake Zynisch
Pollen my head aches stomach churns my hate like nails on chalk and yet i still miss; the void drowned in hate still aches for it’s old state. my veins grow cold as I unwire you from them. Why’d you cross the line? forever was waiting, reflecting in our past. yet we turned away from it. Hand in hand on towards the paths that split. it could’ve been stumbled back to. a long detour, picking up souvenirs along the way. You swing at me with this, slice me down. Spite. And. Bitter. Both seep shrill blue into your green eyes. yet the void does not shake. it will not move. nor drown. but submerge. Baby fountain perhaps through happiness fulfillment became second class. to be content may be the peak of it all but to settle before knowing- that’s the tragedy. seek to know. feel and drown to fight for fulfillment. haunt I search for you in everyone. Everything that brings comfort, resolve or pleasure. Solace is found in your dislikes. movies from our favourite directors you didn’t like, songs from an artist you would’ve loved, but didn’t from growing disdain. The friends you urged me to toss aside. The habits you despised. It runs too deep. I t s u n b e a r a b l e Bear iver I'm all alone. In a cabin. With the coat you bought me. The boots. The necklace. And it rains for us here On the day we never missed together. All the while you’re with someone else. Not someone new. Rewriting your future. Whilst I’m pent up rewriting our past. Everything about her, that draws you into being in her life. I loved. The tiny faults, and cracks in the armor, the silly quotes, excited squeals. The way she made people feel welcome, like an effortless version of my own attempts. She was easy to enamour And she was mine. Not just because she was mine but because of all the shining fragments of her spark. I fed them as much as I could- I brought them up. I brought her to places she could be herself- places she could flourish. And now she flourishes without me, in all the same places. 28/12/25 We watched the holdovers. Early in December. It wasn’t our last movie, that was Zodiac, which we never finished. We loved it, very plainly just loved it. And you mentioned the song, I can’t remember when the needle drops on it but I remember also loving it. Weeks later, during a Christmas that felt like a chore, I watched it again with my family. It, to me, felt like we had found something that could share love so simply, bittersweet and overall hopeful. So I found the song, Crying Laughing Loving Lying, by Labi Siffre. I can’t remember if it found me but I do remember I never got the chance to play it again for you. I can remember that I read into the life and persecution of Labi for being a queer black country artist from the 70s. I can remember how the wind bellowed out of me knowing I couldn’t even talk to you about that. I can remember how much more bittersweet the song became. As it was a piece I found through you, with you, and ultimately now it is about you. And you’ll never know a thing about it. It’s been one year since you left. And I’m still learning what that means. Shinier Today I saw your photo, Brighter and shinier than I remembered. Not akin to my ordinary etchings of you The divots in my skin from where you touched The spaces I can't stop leaving free There's a breadcrumb trail in almost all i do, and if I sit there and trace it - The source is you. So today I saw your photo. Just you. Before not all, but quite a lot of it. And I’m thankful, but bitter, I can’t show it to you. Jake Zynisch is a screenwriter and poet living in Sydney, Australia. SHARE - Issue: 1.8 / April 2026 |